We had our ultrasound today and all is well with Little Peanut. (a.k.a Cutie Pie and Monster Truck) Thank you, Lord!
We love our OB and want him to be our doctor, but walking into his office feels like walking to the guillotine. There are just so many painful memories in that place for me. It was a HUGE relief to walk out happy.
The baby measured 8 1/2 weeks.....a little farther than I thought we were. That was a good feeling. I found out that I was pregnant so early, it feels like I've been pregnant FOREVER already, and I can't wait until I can legitimately just give in and wear maternity clothes instead of trying to squeeze into the last two pairs of pants that fit. How can the baby only be the size of a grape, but all my clothes are already too small? I guess the 30 lbs I've gained from adoption stress doesn't help the situation. : )
When Karissa got off the school bus today, she came running up to me and said, "Hi,, Mommy! Is our baby still alive?" I laughed, teared up, and reassured her that our baby was still alive. We all are longing for this baby very much. We'll just have to take it one appointment at a time. Our next one is January 30th.
I'm a little blue tonight. I built this appointment up so much, and now I don't know what to do with myself now that it is over. I guess I just need to go to bed and get some sleep.
I've been stalling going to bed because there is a writing contest sponsored by Proverbs 31 Ministries that I so wanted to enter. The deadline is tomorrow morning, and I'm not going to make it. I'm just so drained from the emotions of today and got hit with a terrible case of writer's block. I prayed a lot about the opportunity because I do have a desire to write, but I kept trying to force the writing out without inspiration. I think watching this opportunity pass me by has added to the blues. I need to continue to trust God with my dreams and wait for His perfect timing.