Tuesday, January 1, 2008

Sorry I've Been A Bad Blogger

I'm sorry that I have been a bad blogger lately. We went out of town last week for the holidays, and my husband and I decided to leave our laptops behind. We really wanted to focus on the real live people in front of us and we both know our weakness for disappearing into virtual world. I think it was a good decision and helped me to re-evaluate how much time I spend online.

We had a great Christmas. I'll try to post some photos soon.

There isn't any new adoption news. We are still in the phase of waiting for our case to make it through the Liberian courts. After that, we will need to apply for and wait for JJ's passport and visa.

As I was reflecting on 2007, I was wondering what this year's legacy was. What will I remember about this year? All I could think of was adoption. It has been officially a year now, and I was surprised at how much the waiting consumed my year. This blog will turn one year old on January 11th. I'll have to celebrate. : )

Thank you so much for your prayers for me. I have moments of panic and fear, and have been really spiritually distracted, but for the most part, I feel peace, great hope, and a trust that I know is coming from outside of myself. It is a supernatural, stubborn peace that I know is the result of your prayers. Thank you.

I have started to really feel the pregnancy fatigue and sickness, but I love it. It reminds me of the miracle baby inside of me. I love being pregnant. It is such a gift to feel a part of something so miraculous and precious.

I do worry a lot about my selfishness and how much things are about to change. I want the change. I want both of my babies home. I'm just nervous about the change and how easy I have had it for so long. I'm afraid of not being enough for my kids, all four of them. I am scared, but so thankful for the promise of 1 Thessalonians 5:24 "The one who calls you is faithful and he will do it."

5 comments:

Daiquiri said...

Hey Becky - It's so nice to have you home again!

Change is scary. I remember feeling absolute panic at the thought of another little one. Would I love him enough? Would I have enough to go around?

All I can say is...you will. Love just grows. You'll have more than you'll know what to do with. And for the times that you feel stretched too thin...well, that's why God gave us each other :)

Love you! Daiq

jaz said...

Becky,
Happy New Year!!! I'm so glad your pregnancy is going well. I can't wait to see what the Lord has for the Avella fam in '08!! Namely, I can't wait to see a pic with you as a family of six!!!
Love,
Jamie :0)
p.s. We may have to borrow your Bourne movie collection... too fun!

Lisa said...

Becky,
Glad you had a wonderful week away enjoying your family. I was just thinking about you this morning as I was praying for you and your soon to be expanded family! :) God is so good Becky and He never gives us more than we can handle, although sometimes it feels it is ;) I just posted about my own selfishness so I can totally relate on that level. Your fears are normal as change and growth is scary but in the end so worth it! 2007 may have been a year of waiting but 2008 will be a year of promises fulfilled!! Can't wait to watch it all unfold,
Lisa

joe said...

Hi Becky!
Daiquiri always says it so well..
I had many of the same fears last summer. Having one was all we had known...adding to our family was a welcome change but a scary one.

I'm so glad you are back home safely! Thanks for lending us the girls! Take care of yourself!
Love, Marisa

Missy said...

You have been a very bad blogger..just kidding, I've just missed you that's all.

I love those 2 precious pictures of your girls in the next post. Isn't is such a blessing to have children who actually like each other (most of the time)?

I know how terrified you must have been last night with the spotting. You seem to be the one that comes to my mind when my brain has some down time and I take a few minutes to talk to God. I hope you can feel my prayers.

Happy New Year my blog friend.

Love,
Missy